i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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