what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
