Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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