Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
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I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
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Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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