This girl is more easily done than said...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
