garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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