i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize