You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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