this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
