so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
