yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Operation Purity has been aborted
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
