It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
