Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Randomize
