at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
high people should be assigned attendants
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
