Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed