I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize