yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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