I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize