He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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