So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
