That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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