Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
