We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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