god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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