Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
