She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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