you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
