with your own penis?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
not ubering you a puppy
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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