Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
