oh god the rape fog is back!
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Randomize
