i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
