hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
How external is "for external use only"?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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