I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
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