you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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