I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
