we're blogging at a bar
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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