I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
