Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
