Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Randomize
