is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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