Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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