My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
