Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
