My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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