Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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