Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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