i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
My vagina just recognized that song.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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