Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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