Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
