Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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