I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
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